▶ Hooked!

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We Suffer because of our attachment

Buddhism teaches us that cause of human suffering is attachment. Given that I am one of the most habitual packrats I Know. I believe I have suffered dearly due to my attachments. And inability to accept some things which were never meant to last – hooked.

Don’t get me wrong, I covet my ability to remain committed, entrenched and highly supportive of ideas, people, places and issues that matter to me.  Indeed, over the course of my life I’ve had moments of tremendous happiness through reflecting on and reliving various experiences that have refused to let go.

Wrong relationships drain more resources

The tricky rub is I am aware not having let go of passing affections, fleeting relationships and episodic interludes has led me to expend FAR too many resources and emotional capital, my life’s energy

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in the pursuit of restoring or repossessing people and experiences which have yet to return.

Have some positive vibes

In some moments I am clear as I am now, and sober.  I truly believe, I prefer my life to be more as a flowing river. Rich with fast moving content and changing experiences. Rather than a pool of water collecting, stagnating with unchanging, waterlogged memories, experiences and intentions.

What’s bringing these feelings and this recognition to the surface for me today are reflections on my most recent encounters with younger lovers, sexual conquests.  Most of my romantic interests reside overseas and so during these times of COVID-19, my ability to connect and find companionship is SEVERELY BLUNTED 😕 😟

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Looking forward to a COVID-19 free world!

Today I am torn between coveting and hoarding those memories – hooked. Or letting them flee more loosely from me and my conscience in order to allow me to look forward again to future days of traveling and conquests.

For now, will I suffer more remaining in a constant state of reverie?  Or will I find release and peace more in looking to the future and new frontiers? 

I welcome your opinions and input, share and reply……Nathan.